October 15, 2019 —We have been visiting regularly in Borden
[Kendal’s 60-bed skilled nursing facility, serving
the Rockbridge area as well as Kendal residents]
since the store cart was replaced about
a year ago by the “visiting cart,” now supplying
such items as greeting cards and large print
puzzle books for no cost.
Laura Hotinger, Resident
Life Activities Coordinator, and Sybil
Adams, Resident Support Coordinator, held a
few meetings to give us some hints about talking
with residents with dementia and the importance
of confidentiality about their health challenges.
They gave us a list of Borden residents who
they knew would welcome visits, especially
those who don’t have family living nearby.
Contemplating visiting Borden residents we
didn’t know was a little daunting at first, but we
soon discovered our comfort level and found
true joy in these monthly visiting times. While
the cart is a good ice-breaker, the real value is
in the social interaction itself.
Our hosts have included some people in
poor physical condition and some in various
stages of dementia. One welcomes us enthusiastically
and speaks at length of life experiences
long ago, while occasionally revealing
uncertainty about where he is and when mealtimes
are. Another seems delighted to see us,
despite the fact that her living space is very
small when two visitors look for seats. She
paints cards with watercolors and loves to work
in the crafts room down the hall. She has
shared joyful memories of fishing at the shore.
It is truly a gift to be able to move past our
fears of the future and our discomfort at the
sight of people with significant challenges, and
to find joy in socializing with the real human
beings that we find when we walk through
Borden. Many Independent Living residents
have discovered the same thing — by visiting
regularly, reading poetry, helping bring people to
activities like the Kendal Singers or Sunday
vespers, or by being a friendly and supportive
presence at other Borden activities.
We started with the cart thinking that we’d be
“doing good” for others, but we’ve discovered
that the real benefit is to us. We encourage you
to contact Tony Nix, Resident Life Program Coordinator,
who is now coordinating volunteer
orientation and training at Kendal, if you might
see yourself involved in any one of a number of
ways in the Borden Center. Tony can be
reached at 464-2627.
Originally published in the August 2016 Residents’ Newsletter (slightly edited)